Loyal followers,

Paula, Charlie, Ouga and I have been in the boat now for some time. We continue to float aimlessly on the ocean. It was a miracle that we all survived the tropical cyclone. In the chaos, the false floor of the outrigger canoe gave way and revealed Ouga. This angered Paula, who is no longer talking to me.

In fact, nobody is talking to anybody. Paula isn't talking to me because I hid Ouga; Neither of us is talking to Charlie because she won't stop talking about some pomegranate she left with her neighbour. Ouga can't talk.

There is a strange beast in the sky who has been circling the canoe for a few hours. I can't identify it for now because the sun is too bright, but it looks like a huge bird.

There is a blur on the horizon that could be land, or another storm. I hope it isn't the latter.

With boredom/loneliness,
G. Caprice



We have found Paula just in time. Charlie, Paula, Ouga and I have all boarded the outrigger canoe. The others don't know about Ouga, as I've hidden him under a false floor in the canoe. I have been telling them that there is a phantom hog who haunts the canoe to explain Ouga's sounds.

The storm is gathering force, and there is no land in sight apart from Jacakland, now covered in molten rock.

With little hope,
G. Caprice

P.S. We found Paula trapped in a cave underneath the log. There was no horse.
P.P.S. Charlie found a dead horse on the island while we were searching for Paula. It had a strange, guava-shaped indent on its forehead. I hope that we do not also fall victim to Ouga's rage. He seems quite untame.
Dearest followers,

Charlie Pucker has crashed on Jackaland! She ran straight into the volcano's vent, triggering an eruption. There are mere hours before magma from beneath the Earth's crust will begin to spew onto the island.

Charlie and I have begun searching for Paula on her half of the island, but we can not find her anywhere. The only thing we heard was a scratching from underneath a tree trunk, but we assumed that it was one of the horses that Charlie saw earlier.

I have identified the unkown object in the bushes. It was in fact a small man who calls himself Ouga. He speaks no english, but from what I can gather, he has lived on the island all his life. He always carries a stick with a guava attached on the top. He uses it to hit people (particularly me) on the head. I have not told anyone else about him. I hope to take him off the island with us when we leave tonight.

Unless we can find Paula, Charlie, Ouga and I will have to leave without her.

With audacity (I think),
G. Caprice


Dear Followers,

All is not well.

Paula is in grave danger, as she is refusing to speak to me (and she has been making false accusations about me, as I discovered whilst reading her blog), and has closed herself away somewhere on her half of the island. I must find and warn her - I recognise the signs of a volcanic eruption, even if Paula doesn't.

I worry about the dark clouds I see gathering on the horizon. I can only hope that this storm wears itself out before arriving at Jackaland. The tides are also behaving strangely, and they have risen far enough to put out my smoke signal.

There is only one hope left. Charlie Pucker, a woman I have spoken only breifly to before, is attempting to rescue us in her aeroplane (yes, "aeroplane", not airplane. Foolish Americans).
I do fear that she may fall victim to the gathering storm. Charlie, you have been warned.

I have sturted construction of a second boat. This time I have planned an outrigger canoe, for increased stability. I have to make it big enough for three people, as I accidentaly sank Paula's boat, the Suicidal Insanity, whilst trying to find corned beef inside. I havn't told her yet.

Furthermore, I sighted something or someone in the bushes yesterday, and I am fairly certain that it wasn't Paula.

With growing fear,
G. Caprice

P.S. Paula does have the biggest half of the island. I just know it.


Loyal Followers,
Paula is no longer speaking to me. I can only assume that this is due to my consistently reminding her to leave the island. She, in retaliation, has taken a tin of paint from on board her speedboat, and painted a line down the middle of the island, each of us having one half on which to reside.
I am quite annoyed that she chose to use the space on her speedboat for storing paint, istead of, say, rations.
Unless she comes to her senses, I will have to leave the island without her.
With slight irritation,
G. Caprice
P.S. I think that Paula got the bigger half of the island.

Paula has arrived! She washed up on the island this morning in the speedboat, which apparently failed after she left Traulasia. It was pure coincidence (or 'fate' as Jackal would have said) that she wash up on the same island as I.

I have told her that we must leave the island immediately, as the volcano has begun to smoke. Paula disagrees; She thinks that we should stay on the island, as my smoke signal is going very healthily. She says someone is bound to notice it, but I fear that they will merely think that it is smoke from the volcanoe.

I fear that there may only be days until a full-scale eruption takes place, and unless I can convince Paula to leave, we (or at least she) will be doomed. She seems stubborn on the matter though, and is now refusing to even talk of the matter.

I am yet to ask Paula about what happened to Jackal, as she seems slightly volatile at the moment.

Many of the banana leaves from my shikara have begun washing up on the shore. I may be able to reconstruct it if enough return to shore.

Click on the image above for a better view.

With worry,
G. Caprice

P.S. I recently recieved contact from a person called Charlie Pucker. Charlie, should you be reading this, please make haste for Jackaland. We need saving.